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March 22, 2005

Idiots vs. People who have conversations

Now that I'm dating a conservative and my coffee buddy/"most interacted with" co-worker " tends to take the conservative POV, I find myself weighing issues more often and more actively than usual. Which I like. But it's re-irritated an issue that always drives me insane, which is that of labels/parties.

Those of you who know me well know that I have conservative tendencies of my very own. One of my best friends (who is a conservative) is constantly telling me that I'm the most conservative liberal she knows. And see, typing that, I have trouble labeling myself a liberal. Because to a lot of people, "liberal" comes with a reaction equal to that of the one you had when you just found out that my boyfriend is a conservative (if you had that reaction, which most of you probably did and have when I told you previously). That reaction tends to lead to a litany of assumptions, judgments and general hard feelings. Discussions become unnecessary, b/c you "already know what that type of person thinks. It's those kind of people who are responsible for/thinks that [insert issue here]."

Well, no. It's just like any other type of "other." Black people. Gay people. Asian people. Poor people. Rich people. You might grow up never knowing a certain type of person, making lots of assumptions about them and what they think, see media and have limited interactions that support these assumptions. Then one day, you are forced to deal with this person on some sort of unavoidably human level. You work with them. They're in a group with you at church. You're assigned them as a roommate. And then you discover that they are human too - which you knew, but maybe you forgot all that "being human" really encapsulates. And you discover that guess what: As much as you think you might, you have no idea what they are thinking, why they are thinking it, and how they came to think what they do. And maybe, just maybe, even if it just strengthens your way of thinking, they may have some information/insight that you do not have.

And why do people assume I am liberal? B/c I'm a woman? B/c I'm black? B/c I'm "creative" and "artsy"? B/c I have lots of gay friends? Does that mean I automatically think affirmative action is a good idea? That I'm pro-choice? That I think the government should fund the arts? That gay marriage is right? I resent the fact that people:

a. think I "must" feel a certain way about something just b/c of how I was born, and
b. don't understand how I might not feel that way
c. won't listen or even ask why I might have a thought different from what they assume
d. once I question the issue at all, try to label me the other way.

So, I've decided that we should do away with the party/thought labels and adopt something a little more accurate.

1. People who are close minded asshole idiots, and
2. People who are willing and able to have intelligent conversations, share ideas, opinions and information, and potentially agree to disagree, but still treat each other like human beings and just as importantly, give issues the individual thought and consideration each one separately deserves and needs in order for us to remain a thinking, functioning, free society.

Ignorance and close mindedness are bad, but the people who are able but not willing to fall into the 2nd category are the worst.

That is all.

PS - I read This post immediately before writing this.

Posted by nikl at March 22, 2005 01:03 PM

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