Thou Shalt Not Be Boxed

The Power of Showtunes

How Much Does It Suck

...for the guys when the girls win on Survivor. I mean, most of us, every day, are in a situation where it's proven that the "battle of the sexes" is a nuanced thing. But it never fails that when the guys get together all alone, that they are convinced that the women are an easy target.

Ha. Ha.

Keeping Up With South Park

Have we all been keeping up with South Park? I fell off like, oh, I don't know, 6 years ago. When I got DVR in the Spring, the first thing I did was set it to tape every episode of South Patk that came on. I'm just getting around to watching them, and every one is more wrong. So. Very. Wrong.

Brilliant.

Dance with my Father Video

Have we all seen the video to Luther Vandross' "Dance With My Father"? It's a montage of black artists (and Celine Dion) with their fathers. This made me laugh, but this also strangely made me cry. Mostly b/c it's hard for the concept of a father dying not to be sad, but clearly. My favorite part was Stevie Wonder, not only putting a 2 yr old on his head (attempting to get him on his shoulders), but walking around the room at the same time. Should this be a concern? And then when Celine suddenly showed up it almost killed me. Hi, honorary.

I also watched the "Lean Back" video for the first time. No.

Both on iTunes if you have access.

A Few Things

1. Crazy Senior Photos. This is especially funny to me, b/c back in the day of the Dud Escapes, posing for your senior photo was one of them. I think I might try to remember all the Dud Escapes someday soon.

2. I wore perfume today. I am allergic to perfume. I am making myself ill. All day.

3. I've ordered two new items from Neighborhoodies and I CANNOT WAIT.

4. I'm still holding out for the mass Punked. I'm more and more sure that on Nov 2, Ashton is going to take over all television sets and let us know that in fact, yes, Bush was indeed a 4 year joke. B/c clearly.

I Kinda Lose

So, I kinda lose because I've lived in this neighborhood for two years and today was the first day that I ventured, well, anywhere.

Inwood Hill Park (yes, where that girl was murdured), is moments from my door. There are ball fields and a dog run and ball fields and a view of the Hudson. There are paths that are out in the open, but there are also paths that go all up in the woods. I can't see ever (ever) going on those alone - even in the daylight. It's just like hiking in the middle of nowhere, only you're in manhattan.

Bakers Field (the Columbia University stadium) is also moments from my house.

And there's a greenmarket up here on Saturdays.

Who knew?

Photo Stamp Follow-up

I love smart people with a sense of humor.

The Smoking Gun on Photo Stamps.

I'm A Big Nerd

And I don't care who knows it. This is cool. You can get any photo (as long as it's small enough) on a STAMP. Like, for real.

Sweet.

It's When You TRY That it Apparently Becomes Difficult

I've known for quite some time now that I will be travelling to Disney World tomorrow with Randy and that one of the main goals of this trip is to acheive the elusive completeion of the "Drink You Way Around Epcot" challenge.

I knew I'd be best to rest up. That I'd not only be spending 3 full hot days in the sun, but that one one of those days I'd be drinking 11 beers.

All of this is information I have in my very own possession.

Yet, here is a breakdown of the last week:

WEDNESDAY
This is over a week ago, but I'll start here b/c this is really where it all went down hill. First game of softball playoffs. We win! (because the other team didn't show). Well, you have to celebrate things like this. Arraival at bar: 8:30pm. Departure from bar: 12:30am. Photos

THURSDAY
Knew I was leaving for Pittsburgh at 6:50am (on the PLANE @ 6:50), still recovering from Wendesday night softball celebration. I had dinner plans to drink margarita's with Kirsten. Then, when Ted's breakfast birthday surprise for Gabriel was ruined by him forgetting Gabriel wasn't in that morning, we moved it to 5pm drinks @ the Flatiron Lounge. Great. No one to shirk from a adversity, I started Gabriel off with a birthday shot of Patron (had to keep in line with the margarita's to come). Then the bar sent me over a flight (3 mini-martinis around a theme or liquor of the day). Great. I headed to dinner with Kirsten, then to "stop by" birthday drinks for Jim, drummer of Less Nessman. This quickly descended into the Saltine Challange. Photos.

FRIDAY/SATURDAY
Kimberly's wedding, on which I was the consultant

SUNDAY
Randy, Dwayne and Susan had come down to see Frenchie Davis (of American Idol fame) and Norm Lewis (of hot black man fame) in a production of Dreamgirls. I had to drive Kimberly's car back, so I begged them to ride back with me, and they did! 10 hours it took us. What happens in Pittsburgh, stays in Pittsburgh.

MONDAY
Janette (from Kansas City) and I (from St. Louis) decide we're hosting a Monday Night Football event in honor of the Chiefs and the Rams battle for the Governor's Cup. Some battle. I got my ass tomahawked left and right. But Jen and Jannette did apply their matchmaking skills to the likes of me and a nice man (note the lack of the word "boy" - yet). More on that when there's more on that. Regardless, we started at 7:30, we left at midnight.

TUESDAY
Surprise! Robert Nolan's 50th Birthday. I have 3.5 words. Open bar at Rosa's. Photos to come. We managed to leave at a reasonable hour, but guess who left her keys on her desk @ work. Right. So I crashed in Jen's guest room.

WEDNESDAY
Thought I did go out to meet Kelly and some broadway.comers for a couple drinks after work, and Curtis for dinner afterwards, I managed to get home in time to watch Amazing Race (Colin is cruisin' for a major bruisin and I can not WAIT until it happens) and Six Feet Under, get 2/3rds of my packing done AND get to bed by midnight...

THURSDAY
...However, the week is catching up to me, and I'm exhausted! Tomorrow morning at 7:50am, however I'm gonna be ready to rumble.

I knew. I knew all along. You'd think I'd have engaged the information I had before today and stopped, rested to be ready. But I did it all anyway. Dammit. I did it all anyway, and I'd do it again.

Hello??? Anybody there???

The convention doesn't start until Monday (or Sunday) and it's only Thursday and everyone is GONE. Where are all the people?? I was sort of hoping that NYC would be different than Boston. That we wouldn't care enough to be bothered by all the commotion. But I guess not. There's NO ONE HERE.

And this time tomorrow, I won't be either, I'll be landing in ORLANDO!!!

It Looks Easy, But...

Tonight I was introduced to the Saltine Challenge.

I went to a birthday party downtown @ a nice lounge. We're there, the DJ is spinnin', everyone's having a good time. Then the birthday boy's co-workers brings up the Saltine Challenge. Six Saltine crackers in 1 minute. Sounds easy, right?

After a quick trip to the store, the next 2 hours was spent obliterating two sleeves of Saltines. People kept watching, sure they could do it, then trying to no avail. Hilarious, I tell you.

Of course, it eventually veered into "beer vs. 2 saltines" then "beer+shot vs. 3 saltines" then eventually into simply beer vs. beer.

I would say "only in a frat house" but apparently, only in New York.

Wow. We NEED This?

Alcohol Without Liquid???

Banjo! NO! BAAANJOOOO!

Never, ever, ever forget.

Space Ghost Coast To Coast Archives

Hello, WHAT?

Why do some people have to involve others in their insanity? I mean, it's ok to be insane, but keep it to yourself for pete's sake.

Unrelated - someone talk to me about Svetlana Khorkina. I know she's a world champion and gold medal winner a few times over, but what was with the preying mantis vault last night? And the bars weren't much better. I mean, I understand nerves, I understand pressure, but don't come to the Olympics and perform like you walked in off the street.

I'm being harsh again, aren't I.

New Goal

My new life goal is to become the first MacArthur Fellow in the theatre management field.